I awoke this morning at 4:34AM. I sleep next to my laptop. A lot was on my mind. Seeing as how I couldn't fall back asleep, I started writing instead...
Here, now...
When 9am rolls around, I've nowhere in particular to be.
When I do start working, nothing will change from the position I'm in now -- I'll still be in bed, on my laptop, in my pajamas. Welcome to the world of being a (remote) contract worker.
Sounds cushy, right?
There are no bonuses, no vacation days, no health benefits, no 'family' of colleagues.
Company budgets are tight, competition is stiff, and companies don't necessarily have any intention of bringing on contractors they hire in any permanent manner at a later date. However, they will allow you think so if it means the possibility of getting you to generate more and better work for them, at the price already negotiated, again w/o any gaurantees.
Have at it, kiddo! *dangles carrot* Har-har.
You can't sit with us
It started with hiring managers...
The comments, "Your background is...interesting."
The doubting questions, "So do you want to work full-time?"
The silent judgements, "Your background isn't like most of the candidates we reach out to, but..."
Where a candidate with a more traditional background [4yr university, (M)BA degree, full-time employment history] might require 1-3 interviews before being made an at-market-rate job offer, someone with a lesser-traditional background [2nd tier university or art school, BA equiv. degree, contract/diverse work history] can be asked to give as many as 6-8 interviews for similar roles within the same company for lesser wages. I know, I've lived it. Meritocracy much? Not on your life.
Though silent, the message is clear: You are not like the rest of us and you can't sit with us.
I've executed in more capacities in the last 1.5 years than some have in the last 4-5, have had more projects completed (and some then outright stolen or lifted from by full-time employees, some of whom were even management level) than I can immediately recall, and (since I'm often working from home) work longer/later/more weekends than on-site staff.
Depending on the number of contracts I have at any given time, I have been known to work up to 80hrs/wk. It makes full-time look like part-time w/ vacations.
Why, you go getter you
I raise my own salary every...single...month. It's a grind.
At first, I was energized by it. It's hard, gritty, real, and you can eat a bowl of cereal at 1pm sitting on your couch in your pajamas. *clouds open, angel choir sings*
But later? The realization that you're working for (at times, considerably) lower wages while doing the work that everyone else either can't do (either due to time constraints or an unadmitted lack of know-how by the full-time staff) or won't do (because 'ugh') sets it.
It doesn't help if you're a go-getter who willingly adds on work that you yourself initiated because you see that things are broken the way they are and that nothing will work smoothly until said broken pieces are fixed.
Never mind the fact that at times contractors get paid a flat-rate and therefor won't make a dime more for their efforts above what was discussed, nor receive a permanent full-time offer 'because budget' or a 'why buy the cow?' mentality held by management. Just be glad they've allowed someone like yourself the opportunity to see how the full-timers do it -- you're welcome!
Meanwhile, fellow full-time workers appear to ride off into the proverbial sunset with their relatively secure jobs, fair pay, and sense of camaraderie. Must.be.nice.
Enjoy your pajama pants
You have become the (contracted) 20% that does 80% of the work.
PJ pants or no, there's a sort of ironic anti-freedom in this...
You're a contractor, meaning you'll be the first and easiest to let go if sh*t starts to get real at the company. Yet security will become more quickly jeopardized if you don't fix what is (and was already) broken (before you got there). You are essentially hired to help fix the very things which are likely from keeping you from being hired full-time, because until they are fixed, revenue is down. When revenue is back up, you will be thanked and sent home. You're hired to work yourself out of a job while being viewed as both necessary and dispensable by management. See the conundrum?
You're not free, you're a bloody wage slave.
Always a bridesmaid
There's something nice about the sense of security generated by routine. The peace found in structure. What we feel we sacrifice in our sense of freedom, we gain back in other forms such as camaraderie, support, a sense of being understood and accepted, and to know that we are valued while contributing to something greater than ourselves. It all depends on what you're willing to give in order to get what want.
The give and take. If contracting is dating, then full-time is marriage.
When you've reached that point in your career and found the right company, you'll know.
I've heard it said that, "People don't change but priorities do."
Well, frustration occurs when priorities have long since changed but external reality fails to accurately reflect the internal changes taken.
A strength, not a weakness
Perhaps those casting judgement on the contract life forgot about the recent recession that started in 2008 and continued on past 2010? For the companies that still had funding and opportunities available during that bleak and worrisome era, offering contract work was a way for those left standing to continue some form of a career. The cruel irony of having survived the recession through contract work was that when conditions improved, contractors suddenly became viewed as somehow unable to fit nicely back into permanent/full-time work matrix. You are not like the rest of us and you can't sit with us.
Recession survivors had scars, battle wounds. The hard truth is, the world struggles to accept that which it doesn't deem immediately without flaw.
I am not broken.
There's nothing 'wrong' with me.
I'm a survivor that can make it in any set of conditions.
I'm still standing because I contracted.
Contracting became my strength, I refuse to allow it now to be seen as a weakness.
Nobody's Stray Cat
The comments, "Your background is...interesting."
The doubting questions, "So do you want to work full-time?"
The silent judgements, "Your background isn't like most of the candidates we reach out to, but..."
Please, hiring managers, stop asking Contractors if they "Really want to work full-time?"
Frankly, most people can't handle the self-discipline found in contract work, so FT is a cake walk.
When it comes down to workload + hours, I essentially already work full-time and then some, thank you.
Some of you have have no idea what we're capable of.
Finally, I've been grateful for every.single.one of the contracts I've ever held and currently hold.
The experience they've given me is truly invaluable and I would never discount contracting nor those who have made their way from it. The initial freedom experienced in the formative years allowed me a closer relationship with myself that I would have never gotten otherwise.
Again, truly invaluable. I am grateful. Thank you.
